“Conflict is inevitable, but combat is optional.”

::Caution, intense. Also there is a curse word::

Someone in my family threatened to in no uncertain terms disown me from my family because I won't "take the side" of a family member who I think is in the wrong. This person feels as though I should be on his side anyway because he's family. I thought that when I became an adult I reserved the right to have my own opinion and make my own decisions. Apparently according to this person this is not the case and he/she feels like 'kicking me out' of our family will change my mind. As much as I love my family, it's not going to happen. I stand on the side of whats right. Just because we share a family tree doesn't make you right. This is what I wrote in response to this person::

What's good for the goose is good for the gander. As an adult I get to choose who I want in my life and who I don't. Not you. Not anyone. If you want to out me because your "son" is an asshole and by your standards gets to treat everyone how ever he feels like and we should just take it, that's fine by me, I don't need it. If you want to out your daughter and granddaughter for him, that's fine, it won't be the first time you chose him over me. I am sure it won't be the last. Just remember, I have never put you in the hospital or called you names or caused you HALF the grief or problems he has. It's fine, I know my self worth and it's more than being treated like trash. God tells me I have to forgive and that's fine, but I don't have to put myself in situations where I am constantly torn down especially not by someone who has a unearned sense of entitlement. Just explain to me one thing? What did I do to be the outcast? To make you love me less than you love my brothers. Or maybe it's not a love thing. Maybe it's a female thing? Is it because I possess woman parts and have an opinion? Is it because unlike everyone else in this family I don't cater to your every whim? I would think that the way I live my life would make you proud. You used to say all you ever wanted for me was happiness and a good man and I have both. Is it because I don't need anything from you except your time? Is it because you can't control my every move or thought? Sorry that in 2011 I am a free thinker AND a woman. I will not get in the kitchen and make you a sammitch. NOT GONNA HAPPEN. Out me, that's fine. I love you anyway and some day, when he walks away and doesn't look back, I will be standing here.